Social Gaming

Given how many games expect us to be online at all times (from MMOs to Ubisoft titles) and the huge focus on multiplayer, I'm surprised that there's so little interest in social gaming.  There have been a number of small developments, mostly pushed by Valve, but we're well behind the curve compared to the average web user.

1) I want to see where my friends are.
So far, Raptr and Steam are the only two services to implement this (On PC - it's integrated into Live and PSN).   I want to see what game my friends are in regardless of whether or not I own it, before I load up the title.  I want it to be a universal thing, so it's not a matter of having to wonder if my friends have installed it (I'm looking at you, Finch).  I want every game to be compatible out of the box, and I want to see it cross-platform.  It'd sure get me to jump in and play games with other people more frequently.
Implemented: Steam/Raptr

2) Cross-platform chat
 Sure, Steam, Live, and PSN have chat.  The trouble is, I can't talk with my Steam friends while I'm on Live (I refuse to use Live, incidentally), or in an MMO.  We need a level of cohesion consistent with Facebook games if we really want gaming to become a social experience, and that means that we need to have developers (and publishers especially) suck it up and work together.
Implemented: Games for Windows Live

3) Cross-game Chat
If I'm playing Halo, and a friend loads up Call of Duty, I want to know, so I have the option to swap.  Likewise, I'm spending a lot of The Secret World, and don't know when friends are in the Mechwarrior Beta.  This needs to be complete and universal, not just within all games by one publisher a la Blizzard's Battle.net 2.0.
Implemented: Consoles, and Steam

4) Status updates
I want to know if my friend's away.  I want to be able to set myself as invisible sometimes.  I want to leave quick messages from my friends.  I want icons and pictures.
Implemented: New Steam Interface

5) Out-of-game Chat
I want to start coordinating dungeon groups with people as they're loading up their client.  I want to carry chat with me on my phone.  I want to say hi to the friend I haven't seen in a while as he raids Black Temple solo.

Implemented: World of Warcraft (only with guild chat, using the Mobile app), Matrix Online

If only there were a chat platform that wasn't proprietary to any of the major publishers or platform owners that was already widely used and implemented, had group chat rooms, and allowed for players to set their status.

Oh wait.  There is.  AOL Instant Messenger (or ICQ or IRC).

But how do we include it in a game and make it mesh flawlessly?

Fuck if I know, but The Matrix Online did it.  If you can't figure it out years later, you need help.  1999 called, and they want you to learn from their technology.  Suck it up and use a standard that no one can try to monopolize.